Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting -
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.
~from Wild Geese
by Mary Oliver
The world is yours. Until that thing happens. You know that thing that happens that makes you just feel stuck. The gears get stuck in the adult mind. Almost like hardening of the arteries. When a problem appears, the freeze sets in further.
So a coach sits down and talks to me about this problem of mine and sees how stuck in low gear I am. He asks a few questions that always paint a bigger picture. He tells me some stories and parables and soon we are off to the races.
Shakespeare said, "Action is eloquence," and if there were anyone who you'd think would lobby for words being eloquence, you'd think it would be Shakespeare. But even to him, action meant more than words.
And that's what my coach does, he brings me out of low gear into action. The big painted picture can do this. It can open the mind into its creative state.
I was in California this past week visiting my good friends Drs. Ron and Mary Hulnick at the University of Santa Monica. They teach the world's best program in spiritual psychology at their school and one of their most powerful teachings focuses on the low gear statement, "I am upset because…" The minute I make that statement I am out of my mind.....I am squandering my power on some neutral external circumstance (or a person) who I now imagine is upsetting me. It's a false power. A mirage. (Only an internal concept can upset me.) The true authentic power is spirit, and spirit can be found within, as in the scriptural "the kingdom of heaven is within you…"
I am only upset because of my internal interpretations. I'm afraid I'll lose something! ("Loss is a concept" said Byron Katie.) Whatever is happening outside of me is now subject to a full spectrum of interpretation. So my coach sits down with me and listens to my problem. And to him, my problem is simply material to work with. I recalled in FEARLESS how I saw Robin Williams on Inside the Actor's Studio once and he stood up and asked the audience to throw an object-any object, anything-up to the stage. Someone threw him a towel. He wrapped it around his head and took on an Indian accent and said some hilarious things-then he put it around his waist and acted like a man at a steam bath-the towel was just any object-a neutral, meaningless thing until he used it. Re-interpreted it. Just as we COULD do (but don't) with all the troubling comic material of our own private lives.
My coach uses my problem the same comic way. To him, my pain is his "material." He creates with it. He twists is around into different shapes. By the time we are finished, we are both glad the problem is here because we have taken so much laughter from it.
My coach (yes, he's a real person, www.theultimatecoach.net) says "This 'problem' is going to be a great seminar for you. You couldn't have invented a better seminar for you to take right now."
**********************
These are the days of two incomes
but more divorce, fancier houses,
but broken homes:
A message sent from the late George Carlin passed to me by Larry Harrison:
The paradox of our time in history is that we have
Taller buildings but shorter tempers,
wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints.
We spend more, but have less,
we buy more but enjoy less.
We have bigger houses and smaller families,
more conveniences, but less time.
We have more degrees but less sense,
more knowledge, but less judgment,
more experts, yet more problems,
more medicine, but less wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too
recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast,
get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired,
read too little, watch TV too much,
and pray too seldom.
We have multiplied our possessions,
but reduced our values.
We talk too much, love too seldom,
and hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living,
but not a life.
We've added years to life not life to years.
We've been all the way to the moon and back,
but have trouble crossing the street
to meet a new neighbor.
We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've
done larger things,
but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul.
We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice.
We write more, but learn less.
We plan more, but accomplish less.
We've learned to rush, but not to wait.
We build more computers to hold more information, to
produce more copies than ever,
but we communicate less and less.
These are the times of fast foods
and slow digestion,
big men and small character,
steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two incomes
but more divorce,
fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips,
disposable diapers, throwaway morality,
one night stands, overweight bodies,
and pills that do everything from cheer,
to quiet, to kill.
It is a time when there is much
in the showroom window
and nothing in the stockroom.
A time when technology
can bring this letter to you,
and a time when you can choose
either to share this insight,
or to just hit delete.
Remember,
spend some time with your loved ones,
because they are not going to be around forever.
Remember, say a kind word to someone
who looks up to you in awe,
because that little person soon will grow up
and leave your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you,
because that is the only treasure
you can give with your heart
and it doesn't cost a cent.
Remember,
to say, "I love you" to your partner
and your loved ones, but most of all mean it.
A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt
when it comes from deep inside of you.
Remember to hold hands and cherish
the moment for someday that person
will not be there again.
Give time to love, give time to speak,
and give time to share the precious thoughts
in your mind.
Life is not measured by the
number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away.
GEORGE CARLIN
****************************************************
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At the rate he's advancing torguhh the coaching ranks, he'll be the head coach of a big time program before too long. It's hard to believe that only 5 years ago he was an assistant for our KHS team and I don't think it was a coincidence that we had the best year of any KHS team ever. Congrats to a great guy and great coach.
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